I wasn’t very good in school. Or so my grades say. To be honest I hated school. All I was interested in was the high school band, reading, and my Literature classes. I hated biology, math, and P.E. In fact, I flunked out of P.E. in 10th grade. I hated wearing those blue one-piece snap-up bloomers, with the white socks, and white pointy gym shoes. So I never dressed out, which led to points off my grade…
It’s all very dumb looking back.
What do you want to be when you grow up?
In 8th grade, I told everyone I wanted to be a marine biologist. Not sure why I did that. I was not interested in anything science. I don’t remember anyone asking me what I wanted to be when I was a small child. You know back when it was cute to hear a five-year-old say, “I want to be a cat wrangler.”
Today everywhere you look they want us mid-lifers to find and have a purpose.
I did what society expected of me and failed. Married and divorced twice. Flunked out of college the first time.
I did what society expected of me and succeeded. Raised three children, got an education, and become a productive citizen.
I did what society expected of me and now what? Now that I will not grow old with my husbands. Now that I have no plans to retire in the traditional sense. Now that I feel more and more of an urgency to live my life however in the hell I want.
I can’t settle for one purpose. There is just too much to explore. I’ve done things I had never dreamed I could or would be able to do and I plan on exploring even more.
However, there is a bit of trepidation as I journey through mid-life. What will people think as I offer up my next new adventure. Will they ask, “What happened to that last thing you were going to do.”
You try new things. You may get bored. You may have conquered a challenge and ready to move on. Yet we often plug along with what we thought was our purpose, our current life, people, jobs and on and on.
Because people are judgy. I’ve got several projects going on at the moment, yet I am hesitant to tell people about. I’ve “failed” at some previous projects, started and stopped some because it wasn’t the direction I wanted to go. I’m seen as flighty and a failure.
Well, I’m neither and neither are you.
Life becomes comfortable. I wrote about it in a recent blog post – Has your life become like a comfortable pair of sweatpants?
We are afraid to try new things. Our negative self-talk takes over. I’m not good enough. I will just “fail” again. People will point and laugh.
How do you overcome these and look beyond just one purpose?
I did a live stream outlining three ways to help you redefine the conversation around finding a purpose.
Would love your thoughts on the topic!
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