A Journey From Grief to Advocacy – My Conversation with Lisa Sugarman

Lisa Sugarman is an author, a nationally syndicated columnist, a three-time survivor of suicide loss, a mental health advocate, and a crisis counselor with The Trevor Project. She’s also a storyteller with the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) and the host of The Suicide Survivor Series on YouTube. Lisa is also a Survivor of Suicide Grief & Loss Facilitator with Samaritans. She also writes the opinion column We Are Who We Are and is the author of How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids And Be Ok With It, Untying Parent Anxiety, and LIFE: It Is What It Is, Her work has appeared on Healthline Parenthood, GrownAndFlown, TODAY Parents, Thrive Global, The Washington Post, LittleThings, and More Content Now. Lisa lives and writes just north of Boston. Visit her online at her website. for more information and resources talked about in the show.

In our conversation, Lisa recounts her profound experiences with loss and grief, particularly through the suicides of her cousin, father, and childhood friend. She reveals how learning at age 45 that her father’s death, long thought to be a heart attack, was actually a suicide, fundamentally altered her understanding of her past. This revelation led her into mental health advocacy, engaging with organizations focused on suicide awareness and prevention. Sugarman emphasizes storytelling as a crucial tool in processing grief and fostering vulnerability, sharing her journey of coping with her father’s death and her mother’s efforts to protect her from the truth.

Sugarman discusses the challenges children face in processing trauma and the importance of understanding family histories, including hereditary risks related to depression and anxiety. Her evolving perspective on suicide—from seeing it as a selfish act to recognizing it as a symptom of mental illness—propelled her to share her experiences more openly, eventually becoming a crisis counselor with the Trevor Project, supporting LGBTQ youth in crisis. She underscores the importance of recognizing signs of distress and advocates for supportive responses from friends and family.

She critiques the phrase “committed suicide” for its negative connotations, advocating for more compassionate language like “died by suicide.” Our conversation highlights the need to change language around sensitive topics to promote open discussions and acknowledges the unique complexities and traumas of suicide loss. Sugarman underscores the importance of intentional grief processing and seeking support, emphasizing the availability of national mental health resources and specialized support for various communities such as LGBTQ, BIPOC, and veterans. She stresses the importance of addressing emotional challenges directly and provides a mental health resource hub on her website tailored to community needs.